Random title I know, damn you Pocahontas!!!!
So June of last year...... no preggo!!!
Most of that year was the same work 40 hours a week, plan a wedding, live at home with my parents (side note::: I am a mommas girl, and i am the baby, like they would really kick me out. Plus i was not a low life, i had a full time job with my own insurance and paid my own bills and paid rent so no freeloader here!)
Lets get to the first week of November, i was exhausted. I blamed it on wedding bullshit. My wedding was a week away and i had planned my ass off and finally I was here, i would come home from work and sleep until 10 wake up shower go back to bed, then get up at 4am for work, so i could be there by 5am. So Thursday November 4th comes along. It was a normal day at work however i feel like shit. I wanna puke, sleep, and cry all in that order. I was mad at myself for getting sick 2 days before my bachlorette party, I was uber ready to drink my ass off. Come on Bourbon st you know what I'm talking about ( Bourbon street in Illinois).
Since my period ( i know sorry gross) had been so retarded, me taking a home pregnancy test was normal. Do Thursday night after work, i am worried about how we are gonna pay for the wedding, i call my fiance and say hey grab a pee test on the way home so we can cross this month off.
He gets home and my mom gives me a card with a check for $500, this sets me off. I start crying hysterically (side note: i am not a crier, i am a i have to be strong for other people, at funeral i try not to cry cause i want to be the strong one for my family, i am not an emotional person, remember i am an emt i am a ice through my veins drink my emotions away person).
So i am crying hysterically and I tell MM that we need to call the wedding off, we have no money we cant do it so we need to call it off. It took him about 10 mins to get me down off my ledge. I had calmed down when suddenly i noticed I really had to freaking pee. and he hands me the pee test and says get it over with.
So i am in the bathroom and no sooner do i pee on this stick do i see a bring blue plus sign, my logically reasoning is maybe i should wait the whole 3 minutes.......
........3 minutes later, there is now a brighter blue plus sign, so i did what every rationally wedding planning, pregnant, crazy woman would do. I cried. I came out of the bathroom, with the stick in my hand crying hysterically, and i handed the stick to MM. And my poor fiance grabbed my pee stick and started to cry too. Then i told my mom, who once told me back in my after 21st birthday that even if i got pregnant it would be not disappointment or accident, who wanted to be a grandma more than anything, and she cried, which made me cry more...... i am not a crier!!!!! my husband cries more than me i swear!!!!!
No comments:
Post a Comment